approx. 22:20pm

Our eyes meet in perfect equilibrium.

Not taller, yet not shorter. Same body, but with curves, chisels and edges that hint at the effort it took to procure them. Chestnut streaked hair, glinting in the sun. Eyes of your ancestors flickering hazel, chestnut, hazel, chestnut in the golden rays.

You’re always watching. Questioning. Deterring. Motivating. As you gaze through glass, puddles, mirrors and photos – always watching, never speaking, always knowing.

We regard each other as two old friends, old enemies, close companions, abandoned hopefuls.

It’s just you and me, dreamer. Just you and me.

The mirage ripples before me and he appears at your side.

Endless ocean eyes and the ruffled blond hair sworn never again to be gelled into curated spikes since that first youthful summer.

You snuggle into him and my heart thrums with jealousy. Talk to me. Please. Anything.

Your eyes meet and you communicate wordlessly. Fluid, peaceful smiles dance across your faces. You are home. But where am I?

I quiver like an autumn leaf, sent flying by the breeze. Reaching forward – I have to tell him, have to warn him, need to call him, can’t lose him. But you’re both tantalisingly out of reach. The forbidden amethyst of a cavern, miles away from my begging words and lonely eyes.

His laugh. His voice – velveteen honey, a smooth, endless ribbon. Bowing like a cello at an octave that warms like glowing embers.

With my last effort I flee towards the glass. My lightest fingertip, brushes the surface – the glass shatters. A thousand irreplaceable fragments. Glistening warnings in the dying farewell of the February sun. The picture is lost forever yet scorched into the back of my eyes.

And then I’m alone. A fading girl in the golden paradise. Left collapsed amongst the shards of a broken dream.


16 thoughts on “approx. 22:20pm

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  1. This burns my heart. I hope youโ€™re okay and I understand how this feels; you shouldnโ€™t ever have to go through this hopeless lonely yearning. Your writing is so beautiful and captures it perfectly xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Elm,
      Thank you so much for your comment, itโ€™s so amazing to get praise from someone like you who is actually my blogging role model. I was really worried posting this in case the people in my school figured out who it was about ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜Šxx

      Liked by 1 person

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